To the Other Woman


To the other woman in my husband’s life:

I’ve always felt secure in my husband’s love. At the same time, I’ve always known it was a love I shared with another woman – you.

I have seen him smile and laugh when he was with me and I know that many of those smiles and much of that laughter was because of me. I know I make him happy. He and I share a bond that cannot be broken.

I’m aware that you also have a bond with him that cannot be broken. I have seen you, too, make him smile and laugh. But you make him smile and laugh in a way that is far different than when I do. Whenever I see him with you, his smiles shine. His entire face just lights up. In the beginning, when I first saw it, it made me jealous. Jealous that I couldn’t get that same glow out of him, but over time – I learned to appreciate it. I began to look forward to the times when I could observe him with you just so I could see that glow that only you could make appear on his face.

I am so grateful for the time he had with you. That time with you made him who he is now. You, and your husband, taught him to be the person he is. You told him, your husband showed him. Y’all are the reason he is so good to me now.

For years, you nurtured him. You comforted him. You tended to him when he was sick. You did so many things for him, but you didn’t make him come to expect it. The way you were with him didn’t spoil him. It made him want to go out and do the same for others.

Then I came along. You were okay sharing him with me and you let me know it. It made me happy that you did and it made him happy that he had your support. You made it hard for me not to like you. I couldn’t have even if I wanted to. You freely gave him to me, while at the same time, you took me in.

You are the reason I have the life I have.
You are the reason I know true love.
You are the reason my life is happy beyond measure.

You spent 9 months and several hours of labor giving him life and many, often thankless, years after that giving him love. The same day you gave him life, you gave me life. All the years you spent giving him love, you were putting love in a reserve for me. He knows about love because of you. I never had life – on this earth – until I met him. I never knew what love was – until he showed me.

You were always the other woman in his life – and I’m so glad you were. For it to have been any other way, I wouldn’t be who I am.

I am who I am because of him.
He is who he is because of you.

So, thank you.

Thank you for raising him to be the man he is, for without your sacrifice, I wouldn’t know joy.
Without the love you showed him, I would have never experienced love without end.
Without you and your husband setting an example of a loving marriage, I wouldn’t know true love existed.

Without you, I wouldn’t be who I am and the world would be a far different place had you not been in it.

I’m saddened by your passing, but I also rejoice because I know what Heaven has gained…


2 thoughts on “To the Other Woman”

  1. She was an exceptional mother and mother-in-law. You and your family were/are blessed beyond measure and it would be wonderful if all married women had that same experience. Praying that I can be that for my son and that he will love as Tom does. Love y’all!


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