I like guns, Steve Lee

*Clean* Funny Pics has opened many a door for me. It has been a blessing (and a curse). I’ve made lots of friends and met new people. Most are good and great, some not so much.

My mom has been helping me with some things *C*FP and tripped out when she saw an email I’d gotten from Martina Navratilova – even if it was a negative one… There’s been Piers Moron and Jim Scarey getting me booted from Twitter, people wishing my kids dead, death threats from animal rights nutjobs, and I’d be remiss to forget the countless blogs and app reviews that run me into the ground.

But the good things outweigh the bad, even if they may not feel that way at that moment. There’s the countless emails and comments I receive thanking me for the page. People who have said they contemplated suicide and my page helped cheer them up and move past it. Or the girl who emailed to say her brother had been killed in the previous 6 months and my page was the first time she’d seen her parents smile since that time. Then there was Joe the Plumber calling about a blog post I’d made.

All of these are very cool and uplifting. The best, by far – to me, was the friendship my family and I have developed with Steve Lee. When he sent me a friend request, after I’d lowered the boom on some animal rights cuckoo birds that were hassling him on his page, it -of course- made my day, but I tripped out when I found out he’d been a fan of *Clean* Funny Pics!

He was *very* kind to take time out of his day one Saturday to allow my son, Harrison, to interview him via Skype about the Australia gun laws for a school paper. Since then, he’s called from time to time to chat. The coolness associated with that is over 1000.

I recently had my 40th birthday. Unbeknownst to me, my husband had some surprises for me. One being a surprise party that truly did surprise me. I had no inkling at all he was doing that. The other came in the mail shortly after my birthday.

Birthday wishes from Steve -I like guns- Lee! I mean, come on… That just awesome!
Steve Lee Autograph

He’s truly a very nice and humble guy. I love his music, his faith, his love of guns and how much he’s helping us here in the states with fighting the gun control fight. If you’re not familiar with him or his music, you can find his solo “gun songs” albums as well as his family’s albums on iTunes.

I Like Guns on iTunes

Everybody Likes Guns on iTunes

Welcome Road on iTunes

The Lees on iTunes

Time to Kill on iTunes

Does Raising the “Debt Ceiling” Create New Debt? Yes – and No.

There’s been *so* much talk about the government shutdown, raising debt ceilings, etc. lately and in those conversations many Obamanites claim that “Raising the debt ceiling does not create new debt. It only allows for Congress to pay off existing debt”

Raising-Debt-Ceiling2

They’re only repeating what Obama has said without thinking logically about it at all. Obama said

“Raising the debt ceiling is a lousy name, which is why members of Congress in both parties don’t like to vote on it, because it makes you vulnerable in political campaigns. However, raising the debt ceiling “does not increase our debt. It does not grow our deficits. It does not allow for a single dime of increased spending. All it does is allow the Treasury Department to pay for what Congress has already spent.”

This makes *NO* sense to me. Plus, Obama once voted against raising the debt ceiling while serving in the Senate. So, I did what I always do when something doesn’t make sense -or- when I need a laugh. I called my dad.

Here’s what he said “Let’s say you live in a home that has a septic system. For some reason, the system is backed up and is filling your house with -you-know-what. Eventually, your entire house is filled – completely.”

Me – “Okay…”

Daddy – “So, do you want to raise the ceiling of your house, or get the crap out?”

Me – *Laughing* – “Okay, I see your point… If I raise the ceiling, I’ve not added any ‘new’ crap, just given it room to move around, but it seems to me that if I haven’t fixed it and the septic tank is *still* backing up… the amount of space I raised the ceiling is going to just fill up as well.”

Daddy – “Exactly”

My conclusion?

Obama isn’t ‘lying’ when he says that the act of raising the ceiling, in and of itself, doesn’t create new debt, but … he’s talking out both sides of his mouth when he says it doesn’t allow for increased spending. Actually, he’s just lying. It very much allows for more spending. That’s the whole point.

Once again, I presented my sons with this scenario. I drew a house, drew the septic tank backing up and filling the house. Then I said I was going to fix it. I extended the sides of the house up the paper, raising the ‘ceiling’, adding a new roof.

My 10 year old looked at me, one eyebrow raised, and said “That’s not fixing anything. Now it’s just going to fill up to the new ceiling…”

I rest my case.

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Your Child Has Been Upgraded to Teen. Here’s a List of Known Bugs:

Please note: Your ‘child’, upon its 13 birthday, will be upgraded to ‘teen’. This upgrade is not optional and no restarts required or allowed. You can re-BOOT often, but the fix is temporary and generally only frustrates things. There are ‘bugs’ in this upgrade known as ‘retribution’ for when you upgraded to teen.

Here are a list of the known bugs:

•Can no longer speak in complete sentences. Only one or two word responses, such as “I guess”, “yeah”, “no” or “I don’t know”

Ex: You – “Did you have homework?”
Teen – “I don’t know”
You – “You don’t know?”
Teen – “No”
You – “Do you have homework or not?”
Teen – “Yeah, I guess.”

•Makes decisions on a whim or whatever ‘feels right’ at the time -or- puts what he wants ahead of everything and everyone else.

Ex: You – “What did you put in your thermos for lunch today.”
Teen – “Some of your tea”
You – “Mines not as sweet as you like it. Did you add some sugar?”
Teen – “Yeah”
You – “How much?”
Teen – “A little more than 1/4th a cup…”
You – “A 1/4 cup!??! Seriously? In your THERMOS?!”
Teen – “Yeah”
You – “I… don’t even…”

-or-

You – after bunking teen and child in same room because of company – “How’d you sleep last night?”
Teen – “Good”
Child – “Horrible.”
You – “Why was it horrible?”
Child – “Teen made me sleep on the floor…”
You – “On the floor!? We don’t even have carpet!! Teen, what… why… why would…”
Teen – “The bed was too crowded.”
You – “Then why didn’t YOU sleep on the floor?”
Teen – “That’s not comfortable.”

•”Not fair” part of every day language far more often

Ex: Teen – “I have homework and John doesn’t.”
You – “Why?”
Teen – “Because he got finished with his work and I didn’t. That’s not fair.”

•Unable to make small, obvious, decisions if work is required.

Ex: Teen – “I was going to make some hot dogs, but I can’t find a big enough pot.”
You – “What do you mean there’s not a big enough pot? There’s bunches of them…”
Teen – “But there’s none under the counter where they usually are.”
Spouse – “He’s saying that there are no ‘clean’ pots because one of the pots is in the sink, dirty, and the other one is in the dishwasher, dirty.
You – “But there’s still other pots he could use. Just not as big as those two… I’m sure you can figure something out.”

***Almost two hours later***

Teen – “Can you get one of those hanging pots please?”
You – “Why do you need a pot now?”
Teen – “To make hot dogs…”
You – “What?! Seriously? You haven’t made the hot dogs yet???”
Teen – “No, I still need a pot.”
Spouse – “Hey, here’s an idea… I mean, I know this is WAY out there and you’re going to think I’m INSANE for even mentioning it, but you could always WASH ONE OF THE POTS!!!”
Teen – “I shoulda thought of that…”

•Short term Memory loss

Ex: Spouse – “Did you study your social studies?”
Teen – “Yeah”
Spouse – “What did you study?”
Teen – “Social Studies”
Spouse – “WHAT about social studies? Specifically…”
Teen – “I don’t know.”
Spouse – “Then what did you study?”
Teen – “Stuff”

•Misplaces own things-replaces them with YOUR things

Ex: Teen – “I need to borrow your black Sharpie”
You – “Why? Where’s yours?”
Teen – “I don’t have one.”
You – “I went through all the markers, I separated them out, I made sure you have one of every color. I put them in a basket for you… So why do you suddenly not have a black one?”
Teen – “I don’t know. There’s not one…”
***Goes into Teen’s Room – Black Sharpie in basket***
Teen – “I didn’t see that there.”

-or-

You – “Where’s my scotch tape?”
Teen/Child/Spouse – “I don’t know.”
You – “Then where did it go?”
Teen – “Oh, I borrowed it.”
You – “When did you borrow it?”
Teen – “The other day.”
You – “If you borrow something and then don’t put it back, that’s not borrowing. That’s stealing…”
Teen – “I was going to put it back eventually.”

•Forgets how to do everything he’s been taught. Usually at times when convenient to him.

Ex: You – “What are you doing?”
Teen – “Playing the Playstation.”
You – “Yeah, I can see that. What I’m saying is, why are you playing the Playstation right now? Isn’t there something else you’re supposed to be doing?”
Teen – “No.”
You – “Really?”
Teen – “Yeah.”
You – “Every single Saturday for, oh I don’t know… the last 10 years – you’ve had chores to do before you can play video games and such. Have you done your chores?”
Teen – “No.”
You – “Why?”
Teen – “I forgot”

•Completely Oblivious and Self-Absorbed. Thinks he is the center of the universe.

Ex: ***Later in the day after taking homework left behind to him at school***
You – “You’re welcome, by the way.”
Teen – “For what?”
You – “Really?”
Teen – …

Side effects of known bugs are rolling eyes, sighs of exasperation and utter annoyances. Sometimes they come from you and not the teen.

Writing everything they do and every conversation down (and posting to the internet if that option is available) is highly recommended. Parental embarrassment seems to help. If nothing else, save them for when they have a teen who is newly upgraded.

(Note – If you get the female upgrade, add in hormonal outbursts, mood swings and uncontrollable crying. Chocolate is recommended for temporary fix.)

Really, the only options you have at this point is to hunker down and prepare for the worst. The upgrade results in a complete loss of brain activity and the next upgrade, with brain activity restored, doesn’t occur for at least ten years – in some cases, maybe more.

As always, feel free to share